Usually when I talk about dreams on this blog, I talk about the dreams of the future and what I’d like to be in it one way or the other.
Today I want to share a dream I woke up from 15 mins ago, which means this might end up being a double post day. I’m not going to apologize for that like I usually do, because I’m working very hard this year on not apologizing for who I am. Sorry about that. LOL.
Anyway, I’m tired this morning, and not just because it’s day two of a migraine. I am tired because I spent the last bit of my night dreaming. So here goes:
I was a man. One of those awkward, suited, thin men. I reported to a local library one evening to take a test. I wanted to be a librarian, you see. A lady librarian, in an old time dress to match my own wardrobe, handed me this booklet and took me on a short trip. The library was a bit small, but the town was small. We drove through that town of dirt streaked people, and ended up in the corner of an empty building where I would have peace and quiet to read the book.
So I sat down and realized that I was not prepared for the test. I had taken no library classes, and had no degrees. Ooopsie Daisy.
I started taking the test, but the dusty, dark room just wasn’t doing it for me, I guess. I wandered over to the bright, busy, cheerful, loud library, sat down on the floor, and opened the book.
I was surrounded by children peering over my shoulder.
I began to take the test. The librarian would come check on me now and then. Kids would come to me for help with something. And so I sat, taking the test now and then and helping somebody now and then.
The night went on. Somebody to my left was telling some of the kids that I would be part of a new library. One where you could read all the books, not just the approved ones. A library that would allow everybody, not just certain members of the town.
I wanted that library, too. But as I took the test, I got worried. The booklet kept getting larger and longer and harder as I wrote.
“I don’t think the test is wholly about the test.” I confided to the librarian.
Night wore on. I started to get worried. I had to go back and fix some of my answers, and then I started editing the test in certain parts. I hoped silently that the test was about me balancing the test taking and the helping, but I wasn’t so sure. Maybe I should have tossed the test and helped more. Maybe I should have stayed at the other office and taken the test.
The dream ended there. My migraine medicine wore off about the time the kids were getting up, so I never got to have the final meeting with the test maker, who was supposed to give me a pass or fail.
Instead I woke up and realized something. My family is made up of a lot of school teachers and librarians. I was a school teacher. I could have been a librarian. I find myself a writer instead, and it fits.
Once upon a time I had a dream of becoming an author. I have achieved that in some ways. I think it’s safe to say that I will be writing books for the rest of my life. Do you know what the best part of being a writer is? I know exactly who I am, and I am at peace with my role, no matter what it brings.
I hope you have a great day, and thanks for reading!